Reflection: Children

March 3, 1995 I read an article in Japan two years ago. It said that a writer took a train to go back to his hometown, and he had to write an essay for a magazine during the three hours in the train. He supposed that he could finish it in a quiet train, because he had written another article ten years ago in the same train. When the train started, it was a little noisy. He thought it would be calm soon; he knew people usually spoke loudly when trains start. However, the children played with and ran after one another, laughed and whispered repeatedly, and spoke louder and louder. The parents didn't pay attention to their children at all, and also talked loudly to each other. They never stopped. One hour later, the writer involuntarily shouted to them, "Be Quiet!" After a silence for a moment, one of the parents said to the children, "You don't need to keep silent. He is just strange, so it is better stay away from him." The writer was amazed, and he could not speak any more. After all, he could not write one page. Getting off the train, another parent said to him with a smile, "I like to see cheerful children. You are too nervous. Maybe you are a workaholic. Why don't you take a rest?" He was surprised again. He had thought we usually had to pay attention to others and keep peace without noise. He asked himself if he is extraordinary or not. Obviously, he was an alien in the train. Has the common courtesy changed nowadays?" The writer, Makoto Shiina, tried to show this story to us comically. I thought that he wrote exaggeratedly to make it funny. However, He said that this story is true. When I like a child, I like his/her personality, not the fact that he/she is a child. I remember that I had liked every child at least until I was a high school student. I thought about the reasons. I often saw children in the train, and previous generation. When we were children, most of us always wore out-of-date clothes, which our parents got from the seniors; also, our hair was cut by our parents. Nowadays, they appear prettier and neater, wearing more modern clothes than we did in our childhood. However, I noticed that they are not friendly. When I talked to them in a train, they seemed not to be interested in talking to a stranger. On the other hand, we wanted to talk to grown-ups because grown-ups were usually busy and seemed not to care about us, so we were happy if they talked to us; others were too shy to speak out, but they also showed their interest in the adults. People are richer than before in Japan. Some young couples thinks that they can get a better life and enjoy themselves without being bothered by children. Others worry about whether they can educate their children in this complex society. The Japanese birthrate was 1.2 children per family last year. This means a couple usually has one child. These parents take more care of their children than the others who have many children. These parents have more time to think about their children than the others who have many children. Parents' care comes to the one child. The parents have their children wear pretty, expensive dresses. The parents are nervous about their children's every change. When their children start to cry, they worry if they are sick. Of course, this is not bad. Obviously, parents should worry when their children cry. However, my point is that parents worry their children too much. When the children lose their tempers, the parents try to make the children feel comfortable. To some extent, they tend to indulge their children. As a result, the children tend to become impertinent. The children tend not to learn how to care for others. Therefore, children do not attract me any more. I miss this attraction. We have a custom in Japan that we can request our wishes to God in heaven. We write our own wished on a paper and hang it on a bamboo on July 7th. We call it "Tanabata." While I walked around my house that day, I found the bamboo in front of a kindergarten. I read the Children's wishes. They made me smile. They are serious for them but fun for us. "I want to be Superman after I grow up." "Please make me a princess some day." "Please make me ride on a bicycle soon." It reminded me of my childhood and made me think that children are always the same. Children still do not attract me, but at the same time, I feel sympathetic to them. They may not change, but the society makes them vary. In other word, children are victims of the new society.

[English home] [mail]